{"id":29,"date":"2018-11-28T13:59:59","date_gmt":"2018-11-28T13:59:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/demo.themeisle.com\/neve-charity\/?p=29"},"modified":"2021-07-23T20:03:14","modified_gmt":"2021-07-23T20:03:14","slug":"practicing-the-principles","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/practicing-the-principles\/","title":{"rendered":"Practicing The Principles \u2014 Twelve Steps Changed Her"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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(from Essay October 2019)<\/p>

Hi, I\u2019m Wendi, sexaholic in Colorado with progressive victory over lust since November 7, 2011. Recently I attended a regional retreat with the theme \u201cPracticing The Principles.\u201d I really hadn\u2019t given this much thought so I looked up the definition of \u201cprinciple.\u201d One definition is: \u201cA fundamental source or basis of something; a system of thoughts and beliefs.\u201d The Steps give me a new system of thoughts and beliefs which I continuously study and practice in my daily life.<\/p>

The first principle is in Step One: Honesty. For me, my admission over powerlessness was the first time I\u2019d been honest with myself. I now see how being dishonest gave people power over me. I had to learn this principle to become a reliable wife, mom, friend, and person practicing Honesty.<\/p>

Step Two teaches me the principle of Hope. When I heard that I could be restored to sanity, I was desperate enough to try anything. I \u201ccame\u201d to meetings over and over, listening to people share about their faith and trust in a Higher Power. I \u201ccame to\u201d following the wisdom of a sponsor. I began to notice small miracles. I prayed with gratitude, and noticed more miracles. I \u201ccame to believe\u201d there was hope for me. I could have faith and trust in a greater power and let the grace of God restore my Hope.<\/p>

The spiritual principle of Step Three is Faith. I am experiencing what the 12\u00d712 says \u201cThe more we become willing to depend on a Higher Power, the more independent we become\u201d (12\u00d712 36). It\u2019s freeing to not have to have all the answers, to control outcomes. Surrender brings God\u2019s plan into view for me. I trust that God\u2019s got my back, no matter what. I have surrendered many things and all have turned out fine. I just need to stay out of God\u2019s way to practice Faith.<\/p>

Working Step Four teaches me Courage. Courage is strength in the face of fear, pain or grief. In Step Into Action it says \u201cwe were afraid but we took the action anyway\u201d (SIA 58). It takes great courage to finally face the real me, to see that I actually have wronged people. But with courage comes confidence of knowing my real self. Just as a business can make more money if it knows what it has to sell, knowing what\u2019s broken in me gives me the ability to fix it. It\u2019s a fact finding, fact facing exercise that requires Courage.<\/p>

Step Five gives me Integrity. I can be the same on the outside as I am on the inside. Today I\u2019m always honest, especially when I\u2019m wrong. I don\u2019t have to have all the answers! I trust that God and my fellows know more about me and more about what\u2019s best for me. I no longer have an ulterior motive for anything I say or do.<\/p>

Practicing integrity means I give rather than take. When I freely give, I\u2019m freely given. I\u2019m trusted and trustworthy. I sincerely care about people, listen to people, and want to be there for people. It\u2019s a new way of living where I\u2019m often wrong and don\u2019t try to cover it up or blame someone for it. I\u2019m part of the human race, and nothing more. This is ego deflation. My life is transparent, simple, basic. I get to live with Integrity.<\/p>

The principle in Step Six is Willingness. This is a process of moving away from my willfulness and toward God\u2019s will, voluntarily. My way doesn\u2019t work, and I have to be willing to try something new. Being willing means to yield, to concede, and to be agreeable. I\u2019m aware of my defects and, even though I\u2019d rather hold onto some of them, I\u2019m willing to change. Today I practice being willing and when I\u2019m not, I pray for Willingness.<\/p>

Step Seven teaches one of my favorite principles, Humility. Humility is a natural byproduct of accepting that I\u2019m not God and I do not want that job. My only job, as a humble child of God, is to be a channel for His love and peace. Practicing humility I am free to be the person I am with strengths, weaknesses, and feelings \u2013 perfectly imperfect. This, for me, is humility.<\/p>

Brotherly Love is what I learned in Step Eight. This principle shows up in forgiveness and acceptance, not just for my fellows, but also for myself. Acceptance and forgiveness are at the root of brotherly love. Not all people are receptive to this love. This is exactly where practicing this principle is the most useful, with my fellows who are hurting and sick. It is a code I live by now \u2013 Brotherly Love.<\/p>

Step Nine taught me Justice. Simply put, it means I stand ready to take full responsibility and consequences for my words or actions, while not causing harm to anyone else. This justice sets me free\u2014free from guilt, shame, and fear. Free to change my behavior and start a new way of life. I\u2019m at peace knowing I won\u2019t die if I admit I\u2019m wrong. Freedom through Justice.<\/p>

Step Ten is all about Perseverance, a continued effort to do or achieve something despite difficulty, failure, or opposition. It\u2019s a character asset that allows me to keep going or keep coming back, as the case may be. I face myself, I evaluate my thoughts, motives and intents, I admit where I was wrong, and I make amends. I repeat daily, sometimes hourly, forever. Thus, I\u2019m given the gift of intimacy with God and Man as I practice Perseverance.<\/p>

In Step Eleven I learned my second favorite principle, Spirituality. I had no spirituality when I came to SA. I think this was to my benefit since it was easier for me to talk to a God of my own understanding than to one of a religion. Spirituality means I am not God and there is a Power greater than me that I turn to for love, guidance, and forgiveness. I strive to have God-consciousness all the time, not blocked by self-will. I share that connection by my words and behaviors and give the loving spirit to make room for more. I open my heart and mind to the message God has for me and to share Spirituality.<\/p>

The final principle of Step Twelve is Service. I have come to see how my experience benefits others. I had gone pretty far down the scale and yet, here I am, doing service, and hopefully benefiting someone. Service doesn\u2019t have to be a grand gesture to feel good. Helping with readings, setting up chairs, even placing money in the basket \u2013 all are good service gestures. But the most important is sponsorship. I didn\u2019t want to sponsor for a long time. But old-timers kept telling me it\u2019s necessary for sobriety. They were right about everything else, so I now sponsor other women. We do this together.<\/p>

I\u2019m not a teacher or a boss but rather a channel for God\u2019s love, guidance, and grace. I grow in my spirit, my attitudes, and my perspective on who I really am with Service.<\/p>

Keep coming back. I\u2019m living proof that it works if you work it!<\/p>

Wendi F., Colorado USA<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(from Essay October 2019) Hi, I\u2019m Wendi, sexaholic in Colorado with progressive victory over lust since November 7, 2011. Recently I attended a regional retreat with the theme \u201cPracticing The Principles.\u201d I really hadn\u2019t given this much thought so I looked up the definition of \u201cprinciple.\u201d One definition is: \u201cA fundamental source or basis of… Read More »Practicing The Principles \u2014 Twelve Steps Changed Her<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":279,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"neve_meta_sidebar":"","neve_meta_container":"","neve_meta_enable_content_width":"","neve_meta_content_width":0,"neve_meta_title_alignment":"","neve_meta_author_avatar":"","neve_post_elements_order":"","neve_meta_disable_header":"","neve_meta_disable_footer":"","neve_meta_disable_title":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-29","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-essay"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=29"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":158,"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29\/revisions\/158"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/279"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=29"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=29"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sa-israel.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=29"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}